Save Me
by GrittyRe-boot
Summary: "A kid isn't like a stray puppy Hudson, you can't just go up to the courthouse and say 'can I keep it'" Finchel futurefic. More info inside.
1. Prologue

**I don't know why I'm such a massive angstaholic when it comes to glee fanfiction. I hate angst on the actual show and I love to write humor stories, but the angsty ones are all I read and every once in a while I get the urge to write one too. I've just come off of writing two humor stories in a row so I'm feeling the itch. Prepare for family tragedy, an abandoned child, a depressed Rachel Berry and a borderline alcoholic Finn Hudson, but don't for a second think that there's no chance for a happy ending. **

She still comes around every once in awhile. Maybe it's because she's lonely, or maybe it's because she feels comfortable with him, or maybe it's because she knows he can never say no to her, not even now. She won't look him in the eye when they're together, she doesn't giggle or play with his hair when he kisses her the way she used to, she barely says two words to him and she's always gone before he wakes up. But when she's there, when he's holding her small body in his arms, and hearing her breath his name, and touching her moist skin and burying himself inside of her over and over, he feels like he's home again. He's for a short while reminded of those few precious years when she was his, before everything went to shit.

He told her he loved her once, when she was brushing her hair in the mirror. She told him not to say that, that the words didn't mean anything anymore, that he knew what this was. The truth was he had no idea what it was. He couldn't be with her without falling in love with her again every single time and the idea that she didn't feel the same was just too painful to think about for too long.

She's there again that night, when he wakes up she's washing the dishes.

"Your home is deplorable," she says, somehow knowing that he's awake without turning to face him. "When is the last time anyone cleaned up around here Finn?"

"What are you doing Rach?" Finn says. "It's four in the morning."

"I couldn't sleep," she answers, her voice sad and quiet, the way it always is these days. "You fell asleep on the couch again."

"Why don't you come to bed Rachel?" he stands up and walks up to her tentatively. Her body stiffens a little at his touch. And when he kisses the back of her head and strokes her thin arms it's more than she can stand.

"It's not my bed anymore Finn, remember?" she says, shying away from him.

"It's yours if you want it," he says.

She still won't look him in the eye, he can't remember the last time she did. "I should go," she says, almost a whisper.

"You know I don't like you walking home at all hours like that."

"I'll be okay," she assures him. He wonders if she still keeps his taser in her purse, the one he bought her their first week in New York City, she never had to use it, but she kept it there anyway because she knew that he worried. It wasn't the most romantic of gifts, but it showed how much he wanted to protect her, how much he loved her. And he knew she loved him for that. That was of course when she still loved him. When she still could.

"At least stay until the sun is up," he says.

"Why do you want me to stay?" she says. "I'm not exactly a joy to be around these days."

He looks at her face, she doesn't resemble herself anymore. Her big eyes that were once filled with hope and energy are now filled with sorrow, she's skinnier than she's ever been and she looks as if she can't remember how to smile. All he wants to do is reach out and touch her face, to hold her in his arms and kiss her and undress her slowly but he knows she won't let him. Tonight's not one of those nights.

"Please Rachel," he says almost desperately.

"I'm sorry I woke you," she says, her voice breaking as she starts toward the door.

"Wait," he says, grabbing his jacket and slipping on his sneakers frantically. "I'll walk you."

This time last year she'd say something about him being chivalrous, but of course this time last year she would be in their bed, fast asleep in his arms where she belonged.


	2. The Fire

She was so nervous, more nervous than he had ever seen her, and that included the first time she ever set foot on the Broadway stage. She paced the bathroom floor, wringing her hands and whispering to herself like the homeless schizophrenics they tried to avoid eye contact with when they walked home at night.

"How long has it been?" She said, finally stopping.

"30 seconds," Finn said matter-of factly.

She walked up to him and buried her face in his chest in frustration. "Why can't time go faster?" she said as if she really meant it.

"Would you relax," Finn said, kissing her forehead. "Think about something else."

"Like what?" she said looking him in the eye.

"What do you want for dinner tonight?" he said. "We can have some of that Miso soup you like from Wa Fu, and avocado rolls and I guess _I_ can just grab a burger or something."

"How can you think about food when I could be pregnant Finn?" She said. "What am I going to do with a baby? I'm 26 years old, we're not even married, I have so much more that I want to accomplish, and look at this cracker box we live in, we'll have to get a bigger place and you'll have to work more hours and there's no money and, oh my god Finn there's no money. What is our baby going to eat or wear? How am I going to afford infant voice lessons? What are we going to do Finn?"

"Whoa, Rachel," he said rubbing her arms comfortingly, the bit of fear evident on his face the way it always was when she got that way, but he stood his ground. "It's going to be okay."

"How?" She says.

"I have a great job, and the baby will have the best infant vocal trainer in New York for free, Rachel Berry," she almost let her lips turn up a little at his compliment. "And you can teach other kids too, only you know, you'll charge _them,_ and that will hold us over until you can start auditioning again. And we can keep the crib in our room until we can find a bigger place. I promise you it's going to be okay."

"You make everything sound so simple," she says as she relaxes a little into his embrace.

"It is simple, I love you, and our baby more than anything, I would never let anything bad happen to you guys, ever."

"Finn we don't even know if I'm pregnant yet."

He simply nodded toward the stick on the bathroom counter, a small smile gracing his lips. She turned her head towards it.

"Positive," she said with tears in her eyes. "We're going to have a baby. We're going to be a family."

He kissed her tenderly, feeling as if he'd never loved someone so much in all of his life. "We're going to be a family."

* * *

><p>They should have torn that place down years ago, Finn thought as he doused the blaze. Over the years it had grown more and more decrepit until one day it decided to catch fire. They all suspected arson, it couldn't have been electrical, and nobody really cared about that place anymore, it was the perfect target for a bored pyromaniac at 1 am. At least they didn't have to worry about loss of life, as long as they could keep it from spreading none of the surrounding buildings were in any danger, all in all it was a pretty standard job.<p>

"There's a girl, there's a girl up there!"

Fuck.

"What are you talking about kid?" says Dennison, confronting the young bystander who they all assumed was trying to get attention.

"She lives up there, on the top floor, I bring her food sometimes," said the kid.

"Are you fuckin' with me kid?" Dennison growls.

"I swear," the boy says, tears springing to his eyes.

Finn overhears everything even as he's hard at work trying to put out the fire.

"It hasn't reached the top floor yet sir," he reasons, knowing how stupid it would be to go in.

"Don't even think about it Hudson."

"Take this," Finn says, putting the hose in his hand before running off, not giving Dennison enough time to argue.

Finn Hudson didn't put his life on the line in dumber ways than everyone else because he was braver, or stronger or even because he felt he had nothing left to lose. He did it because of her, because of the girl who always believed that he was something more, who always saw him as her hero, even when he didn't see that about himself. She was braver than anyone he knew, and being with her made him that way too, ever since high school when he realized through her that there was more to life than being big man on campus, that there were people who counted on him for other things, important things. And as he climbed a high ladder into a burning building to save a girl who might have not even existed, he thought of how proud she would be. It's what kept him going, even now, even when she wasn't there to share his stories of heroism with.

"Is anybody up here!" Finn cried.

She doesn't answer him, but he can hear her coughing through panicked tears. It doesn't take long to find her huddled in the corner, her skinny knees hugged to her chest. He doesn't give himself time to take in her appearance before running up to her and gathering her into his arms, but he supposes that she's about six, and judging by her clothes it hasn't been the easiest six years for her.

The flames haven't started climbing the west side of the building yet, so he takes the opportunity to scale down the ladder as quickly as possible, the little girl's arms wrapped around his neck. As he begins to climb down her grip on him tightens. She's afraid of heights.

"What's your name kid?" he says, trying to distract her.

"Naomi," she says quietly.

"Naomi, that's pretty," he says, still climbing. "I'm Finn."

"Like a dolphin?" she says, her voice still thick with tears.

"Yeah, like a dolphin," he almost loses her when a ball of fire explodes through the window beside them, so close that he can feel the heat wash over his face. She grabs tighter and continues to sob.

"We're almost there, just hang on," he says as she buries her face in his shoulder.

They finally reach the ground, but she doesn't let go, and he doesn't make her.

"Is she alright?" Dennison says, the stern look still on his face.

"I think so," Finn answers.

"Well let the EMTs take over, you still have a job to do Hudson," even through his gruff demeanor Finn can tell that he did good.

He takes her to the ambulance and sets her down, "These nice people are going to take care of you okay?" he says, and he finally gets a good look at her face, she's beautiful, with brown eyes like saucers and a shy, sweet face, her skin is dark and she wears her hair in thick braids covered in a gray skull cap, her clothes are far too big for her and full of rips and holes that he can tell were there before the fire.

"How old are you?" Finn says.

"Six and a quarter," she answers. She's smart, she must have been to school at some point. He wonders to himself what could have happened to this girl.

"Okay, I'm going to finish putting out the bad fire, but I'll be back to check on you, are you going to be okay?"

She simply nods. Never taking her saucer eyes off of him.

* * *

><p>"Naomi Travers, we have one Naomi Travers born February 7 2021 to Wanda Travers, father unknown," says Officer Blankenship, looking the girl up.<p>

"She doesn't have a dad?" Finn says pacing the floor.

"Everyone has a dad Hudson. We just don't know who hers is," He continues. "Look, she's the state's problem now, you've done enough for one night."

"Where is she going tonight?" Finn says, concerned.

"I've already told you more than I should Hudson, you're not a cop. You need to go home, you've had a long night."

"Just tell me where she's going," Finn says, annoyed.

"She wasn't injured in the fire, there was some minor smoke inhalation, nothing too serious though. She'll spend the night here most likely, we'll set her up with a case worker on Monday," Blankenship says.

He's still pacing the floor, "What if I take her?" Finn says.

"Yeah, okay," Blankenship says sarcastically.

"I'm serious, she can have my bed, I'll take the couch. The case worker can come get her Monday."

Blankenship gives him a look. "That's not up to me, but if you can get the okay from Matthews—

Finn leaves before he can finish his sentence.

* * *

><p>The dishes haven't been cleaned since the last time Rachel let herself in in the middle of the night, there are sports illustrated magazines and TV guides scattered everywhere, his clothes are piled up on the floor from all of those nights he didn't give enough of a shit to drag himself to the bedroom and there are even a few stray liquor bottles lying around. He knows that there's no reason to try and impress a six-year old, but he must admit he's a little embarrassed about his place, still it beats an abandoned motel in the bad part of Queens.<p>

"Sorry, it's a bit of a mess," he says bashfully. Naomi doesn't answer, she just lets out a loud yawn.

"Come on, I'll show you where you'll be sleeping tonight," he leads her to his bedroom, it's a little nicer than the living room, mostly because he never goes in there anymore, still the bed is unmade and it smells a bit like the inside of a gym bag. "I'll be on the couch, wake me up if you need anything."

She lets go of his hand and makes her way to the bed, collapsing onto it without another word. He's pretty sure he's never seen anyone fall asleep that fast.

"Goodnight Naomi," he says, smiling for the first time in what felt like months.


	3. Fancy Dress

She sang to the baby, all the time, she read somewhere that she could hear her voice in the womb. Sometimes he would join in, they would sing classic Broadway duets, and rock songs, and pop songs and old standards from their years in glee club.

_Have I ever told you, how good it feels to hold you, it isn't easy to explain—_

"Rach," Finn said cutting off his jam session with his unborn daughter, "Did you feel that? She kicked."

"Of course I felt it, it's happening inside of me," Rachel giggled. "Somebody likes the Ronettes."

"That was the Ramones cover babe," Finn explains. "Our little girl is a rocker."

"You're a bad influence, she never kicks when I sing Rogers and Hammerstein or Sondheim," she said, pouting.

"That's just because she doesn't want to interrupt, she knows who her mommy is."

Rachel bent down to kiss him, "You're such a sweetie, not to mention a horrible liar." She kisses him again, longer and deeper than the one before.

As their lips part and he looks deep into her eyes there's only one thing he can manage to say.

"Marry me."

She smiles affectionately at him. "I told you, you don't have to marry me just because I'm pregnant. I'm a modern woman Finn, and I'm secure in my relationship with you. Besides, more and more women in showbiz are having children and maintaining long-term relationships without getting Married. There's Angelina and Brad, Goldie and Kurt, Madonna—

"Rachel," Finn says cutting her off. "I don't want to marry you because you're pregnant, I want to marry you because…"

"Because what?" she says, goading him on.

He smiles and shrugs like it's the simplest thing in the world. "Because you're you."

* * *

><p>When he wakes up it's as if he's in a different apartment, he doesn't think it's ever been this clean before. The magazines are stacked neatly on his coffee table, his dirty clothes are nowhere to be seen, the dishes are washed and stacked, it even looks like the carpet's been vacuumed.<p>

"Rach?" he says groggily.

"Who's Rach?" the small voice answers, pronouncing the "R" a little bit like a "W." He spots her sitting on the barstool by the kitchen counter. She's eating cereal and watching some cartoon on his TV.

"Oh hey," he says, remembering the events that brought her there.

"Good morning Dolphin," she says casually. He stands up, stretches and rubs the sleep out of his eyes. "I made you a bowl of cereal, I put the milk in a mug so it won't get soggy, soggy cereal's gross."

"Did you clean up my apartment?" he said.

She looks at him with her wide eyes and shrugs. "I didn't know where your clothes went so I putted them on your bed."

"Thanks, but you didn't have to do that." He says.

She shrugs again and turns her attention back to her cereal. He sits down too and pours the milk over the froot loops that she's made for him. In his waking he notices that she's cleaned up more than his apartment. She's undid her braids and pulled her thick bushy curls back into a barely contained ponytail, she's scrubbed the soot from her face and traded in her oversized plaid shirt and jeans for a an even more oversized, very familiar lacy dress.

"Where did you find that dress?" he asks.

"In your closet," she says casually, clearly having no qualms whatsoever with going through his things. "Why do you have a dress in your closet?"

He gives her a sad look. "It's my wife's."

"Oh," she says. "What happened to her?"

"What makes you think something happened to her?" Finn says.

"Because she's not here," Naomi explains. "Where is she?"

"Um, it's kind of a long story," he says, scratching the back of his head.

"She must have a lot of pretty dresses," she says, playing with the intricate pink lace on the one she's wearing.

"Yeah, she's a bit of a princess," Finn says affectionately. "So, what are you watching?"

"Doug," she says, "I never seened it before."

"It's kind of an old cartoon," Finn says, his memory returning. "I think I was younger than you when this got cancelled."

"It's funny, I like Skeeter, I had a dog named Skeeter but he ranned away. I don't know why the one in the show is blue though, nobody's really blue—"

"Naomi? Can I ask you something?" Finn says, interrupting her. "What happened to you? Why were you in that motel?"

"That's where I lived with my mommy," she says.

"What happened to her?"

Naomi lowers her eyes sadly. "She went to get us food and she didn't come back."

"How long ago was that?"

She shrugs. "I don't know."

"Try to think, how many days?" She begins to count on her fingers at this point.

"About this many," she says, holding up nine fingers.

Finn's heart sinks, he doesn't understand how anybody could just leave a little girl like that, something awful must have happened to her mother.

"I miss her," Naomi says, "I hope she can still find me now."

"Yeah," Finn says, snapping out of his thoughts. "I'm sure she will," he lies.

"Dolphin, since I was good and I cleaned up your house and I made you breakfast and stuff does that mean…"

"Does it mean what?" Finn says.

"Does it mean you're still going to arrest me?" she says timidly.

He's confused. "Why would you think I'd arrest you?"

"Because I set the motel on fire," she says. "I didn't mean to, I forgot to put out the candle before I went upstairs," she starts to cry a bit now, her face scared.

"Hey, hey, hey," he says gently grabbing her shoulders and making her look him in the eyes. "I'm not a cop, I can't arrest anyone, and even if I could I'd never arrest someone who made me froot loops, it's like the best cereal ever."

She smiles a bit through her tears. "Do you want some more?" she says, holding up the box.

"Absolutely," he says, deciding he kind of likes this kid.

**Don't worry, I will explain what happened to Rachel and their baby and where Naomi comes in. I've never written a major child character before so I hope I don't end up making her too precocious or cutesy. And this story probably won't include too many other characters from the show, but Kurt and Blaine will come in soon and Burt and Carole should also make an appearance at some point.**


	4. Somewhere That's Green

**To give you an idea of what time the story takes place in, Naomi was born in 2021 and she's six now which makes the year 2027, which makes Finn and Rachel both about 32 years old. I hope that helps.**

"Finn," she said, nudging him.

"I don't want any," he said groggily before drifting back to sleep.

"Finn," she repeated a bit more forcefully, shaking him harder that time.

"Go back to sleep babe," he said, still not all there.

"Ahh!" she cried out in pain, waking him up instantly.

"What's wrong Rachel? Is it the baby? Is she coming?" he said frantically.

"Yeah, my water broke," she said, nodding vigorously and trying her best not to cry. "We have to get to a hospital."

He jumped out of bed, pulling on his shoes without paying much mind to whether they were matching or not and searching frantically for his keys.

"Where are the keys? Where the hell are they?" he said, starting to panic.

"We don't have a car Finn," she reminded him. "We have to take a cab."

"Okay, okay," Finn said, still freaking out a little. "It's going to be alright," he continued, seeming as if he was trying to convince himself as much as her. "Does it hurt a lot?"

"Only every— Ahh!" she said, doubling over. He reached out for her, concerned. "She's in a hurry Finn."

"Alright, hold on Rach," he picked her up in his arms, she was a little heavier than usual, but still more than light enough for him to manage, she put her arms around his neck, letting him hold her close.

"Ahh, Finn it hurts so much," she said, crying into his neck as he carried her down the stairs.

"I know baby but you're just going to have to hold on until we get to the doctor. They'll give you those drugs that make you not feel your girl parts."

"Oh god I hope so," She cried.

"Taxi!" Finn yelled immediately as he got out onto the sidewalk. It took three tries to get one. As soon as it stopped he placed her in the cab as gently as possible.

"Finn hold my hand," she said, grabbing his hand.

"I need you to get us to the nearest hospital," he said urgently. "Were on our way now Rachel," he said turning to her.

"We're gonna have a baby!" she said, her excitement showing through the pain.

"Yeah," he said holding her close and stroking her hair as the cab made its way. "We're having a baby."

"Ahh! Ow! This sucks, this sucks so much!"

"I wish you didn't have to go through this," He said sympathetically. "I wish I could feel the pain for you."

"No you don't you goddamn liar!" She snapped, holding her stomach. He scooted away a bit, giving her some space. "No, stay next to me Finn, I love you so much," she sobbed.

"I love you too," he said, moving closer to her and kissing her softly, first on her wet, tear-streaked face then on her trembling lips. "Can you please hurry?" he said to the cabbie as their lips parted.

"Trust me I'm going as fast as I can," The cabbie said. "I don't want that kid being born all over my seats."

"We'll be there any second, I promise," he said, not letting go of her the whole way there.

* * *

><p>He knows he shouldn't let her go through his photo albums, that his life has nothing to do with her, but she seems so engaged he doesn't have the heart to stop her. He doesn't get it, Finn never liked to look at pictures that he wasn't in, he just assumed that other people were the same way. He wonders how Rachel would feel about it. In the age of digital this and digital that she had painstakingly put together an honest to god photo album, like the dusty ones he remembered looking through when he would play in the basement as a kid. Rachel was old fashioned that way.<p>

"Is this your wife?" she says, pointing out the first picture in the book marked Berry-Hudson Family Memories. He loves that picture, it's the candid shot that Kurt took of them on her first night playing Linda in The Wedding Singer, her first Broadway role ever, it wasn't the biggest part, but she may as well have been the star. He had his arms around her, hoisting her up and pressing his lips to her cheek as she faced the camera, laughing and hugging him around the neck, a bouquet of roses in her hand.

"Yeah, that's Rachel." he says, a little sadly.

"She's pretty."

"She looked beautiful that night," Finn says pensively. "Even with the big 80's hair and cut-off shorts."

"Why don't you want to talk about her?"

"It's not that I don't want to talk about her, there's just nothing to say," Finn says quietly. "She left, five months ago."

"Like my mommy?"

"You know what?" Finn says, hoping to change the subject. "Why don't we get out of here? I'm sure you don't want to be cooped up in this sardine can all day."

"Where are we going?" she says almost giddily, closing the photo book immediately.

"Well first things first, you can't keep wearing that dress."

* * *

><p>He hasn't went shopping in ages, he can't say he missed it all that much, but she's so excited he almost finds himself enjoying it. She picks a vintage clothing store on Bleecker, he imagines she likes it because of the purple unicorn in the store window.<p>

"That's what you want to buy?" he says as she comes out of the fitting room. She's wearing multicolored striped tights, a pink hoodie with turquoise butterfly wings and antennas on the hood, jean shorts, and a frilly mesh skirt. She nods excitedly at his question. And he has to admit she looks pretty awesome. "Alright, come on, get out of it so they can ring us up."

They go to central park after that and have hot dogs and snow cones, and she skips and drags him around by the hand. She seems pretty well-adjusted all things considered, but he supposes that kids are better at dealing with the hard stuff. Tomorrow is Monday, and he knows that he has to take her back, but for the time being he enjoys her company, it reminds him of a happier time. A time when he didn't feel so alone.

"Dolphin?" she says as she tosses bits of her hot dog bun to the pigeons.

"Yeah?" he says.

"Where are they going to take me tomorrow?"

He looks at her, trying to think of something comforting to say, "I don't know," being all he can muster.

"Am I going to be like Annie, the girl in the play?"

He snaps his gaze toward her, noticeably surprised. "You know about that stuff?"

She nods vigorously.

"How do you know about that stuff?"

"My mommy used to clean up the playhouse for work. We got to watch the people practice sometimes," she says. "My favorite was the one with the big plant."

"Little shop of horrors? That play didn't scare you?"

"No," she says giggling.

"It scared the hell out of me when I was a kid," he admits.

She giggles even more, hurting his pride a little.

"Okay, it's not that funny," he says.

"Do you like to sing Dolphin?" she says, no longer laughing.

"Yeah, I love to sing actually," he says.

"I'm the best singer," she says, reminding him a little of Rachel, or at least the Rachel he used to know.

"You are?" he says. "Prove it kid."

He expects her to shake her head, cross her arms and refuse. Kids were just like that, he remembered when he was seven and he told all of his friends that he could do a double backflip off of the diving board, even though he only assumed that he could. An assumption that proved very wrong when he ended up in an arm cast for the rest of the summer. But she didn't refuse, she stood up in front of him with a surprising amount of bravado and actually opened her mouth to sing.

_A matchbox of our own_  
><em>A fence of real chain link,<em>  
><em>A grill out on the patio<em>  
><em>Disposal in the sink<em>  
><em>A washer and a dryer and an ironing machine<em>  
><em>In a tract house that we share<em>  
><em>Somewhere that's green.<em>

_He rakes and trims the grass_  
><em>He loves to mow and weed<em>  
><em>I cook like Betty Crocker <em>  
><em>And I look like Donna Reed<em>  
><em>There's plastic on the furniture-<em>

She stops in the middle of the second verse when she loses her nerve and starts to giggle almost uncontrollably. He figures it's a combination of the cotton candy from earlier or the dopey look on his face that makes her dissolve into hysterics.

"Why do you look like that?" she said through her laughter.

"Because," Finn said, trying to find the words, "Because that was amazing." He said sincerely, her pronunciation was far from perfect but she had an incredibly strong voice for her age, even for someone a few years older. "How did you learn how to sing?"

She shrugs, "I've always known, I guess" she sits next to him again. "Okay, your turn." She continues, fully expecting him to get up and sing for her.

"Seriously?" he says knitting his brow nervously.

"Yeah, your turn."

"Okay," he says. "Um… _Just a small town girl_—

"No," she interrupts. "We're doing Little Shop, you have to sing little Shop."

"You know you're really demanding," he says jokingly.

"Come on Dolphin, Little Shop!" she says, shoving him a little.

_Come on do Rush! Do Tom Sawyer Daddy!_

"Okay, Okay," he finally stands up, a smile on his lips betraying his somewhat sad eyes at the sudden memory flash.

_When I was younger, just a bad little kid,_  
><em>My mama noticed funny things I did,<em>  
><em>Like shootin' puppies with a B B gun<em>  
><em>I'd poison guppies, and when I was done<em>  
><em>I'd find a pussycat and bash in its head<em>  
><em>That's when my mama said<em>

What did she say? Naomi cries surprising him by how well she knows the play.

_She said, "My boy, I think someday_  
><em>You'll find a way <em>  
><em>To make your natural tendencies pay<em>  
><em>You'll be a dentist<em>  
><em>You have a talent for causin' things pain<em>  
><em>Son, be a dentist<em>  
><em>People will pay you to be inhumane<em>  
><em>Your temperament's wrong for the priesthood<em>  
><em>And teaching would suit you still less<em>  
><em>Son, be a dentist<em>  
><em>You'll be a success<em>

She claps enthusiastically as he finishes. "You're good Dolphin."

"Thank you," he says, sitting back down. "God I can't remember the last time I sang."

She yawns and he realizes that the sun is starting to set.

"Alright, time to go kid," He says a little reluctantly.

He has to admit, this is the best day he's had in a really long time.


	5. Julie

**Okay, I'm seriously afraid that I'm going to rip out your hearts and stomp all over them with this story. I hope that you guys don't stop reading, but if you do I'll understand. I'm getting depressed just writing it. But still, no matter how bad things get, think happy ending, and some happy stuff along the way too of course.**

It was official, Julie Carole Hudson was the most beautiful girl in the world.

"Oh my God, look at her Finn," Rachel said, tears in her eyes. "She's perfect."

Rachel didn't have to tell him to look at her, he couldn't tear his eyes away from her, he didn't understand how he could love someone so completely that he'd only known for a few minutes. She was so soft and pink and small and gorgeous. And Rachel was so brave and amazing thorough the whole thing and he loved them both so much. He couldn't believe it, he had a family.

"Do you want to hold her?" Rachel said.

"I don't know, do you think I should? I mean she just came out of there," he said nervously.

"It's okay," she said. "Do you want to go to daddy Julie?"

At that she handed him the baby, and it was all he could do not to freak out. But once he had her in his arms he knew that he never wanted to let her go. "Hi baby, hey Jules," he decides that he was going to call her Jules. He liked the way it sounded when he said it. "I'm Finn, I'm your daddy," she opened her eyes at that point and looked at him as if she knew him and it made his breath catch in his throat and his eyes tear up. He didn't know that he was capable of being such a sap, but he couldn't help it. He was in love with that baby. "Hey Rach, she looked at me, she looked right at me," he said excitedly. When she didn't answer he turned to his wife, and he saw that her eyes were now closed and a small smile graced her lips as she slept.

"Mommy is sleeping now," Finn whispered to his newborn before bending down to kiss Rachel's forehead.

"I love our family," she said sleepily, not opening her eyes.

"I love you."

* * *

><p>The case worker, Mrs. O'Neill gets there at 8:30 on the dot, he wishes she would have dragged her feet a little more. He doesn't want Naomi to go, and he knows that Naomi doesn't want to go either.<p>

"So, I had a lot of fun yesterday," he says softly to the little girl as the woman stands there with her file, an impatient look on her face. "You're awesome kid, I hope you know that."

Naomi doesn't say anything back, she just looks sad.

"Where are you going to take her?" Finn says to the case worker next, a slightly worried look on his face.

"Unfortunately we haven't been able to locate the child's mother. So I'm afraid until we find a suitable foster care situation for her she'll have to be placed in a group home for awhile."

"Like Annie," he says under his breath.

"Excuse me?" she says.

"What? Nothing," he says, shaking his head.

"Okay honey, it's time for you to come with me," O'Neill says as sweetly as she can manage, even though Finn can pretty clearly tell that she would rather be doing anything else.

"Are you going to come visit?" Naomi says quietly.

"Um, I don't know," he says. "Is that kind of thing allowed?" he continues, addressing the case worker.

"I suppose that's something you'll have to take up with the home," O'Neill says.

"I'll see what I can do," he says, and with that she leans in to hug him, and he hugs her back, closing his eyes and savoring it. "Okay, you take care of yourself alright?"

She finally lets go, and he misses the contact instantly. She reluctantly goes up to Mrs. O'Neill and grabs her hand, giving Finn a small wave as she leaves. As soon as she came, she's gone.

He needs a drink.

* * *

><p>"Come on Julie sing me your song," Rachel's voice is offscreen and a beautiful, freckled three almost four-year-old is standing there, pouting and shaking her head. Finn's watched this DVD so many times he doesn't understand how it still plays, and as he takes another swig of whiskey he doesn't understand how he hasn't passed out by now.<p>

"Nope, it's a secret song." She pronounces her R's like W's "Daddy taught me."

"That's right Jules, it's our secret song." Finn is onscreen now, joining the girl in teasing Rachel, a mischievous grin on his face. As Finn watches the home movie he barely recognizes himself, the Finn onscreen is like a clean, happy, strong, bright-eyed version of the Finn sitting on the couch, drowning his misery in Jack Daniels, unshaven and terminally alone.

"I won't tell a soul," Rachel promises.

"Nope, it's a secret," Julie repeats.

"Please, pretty please," Rachel says sweetly.

"Oh, okay," Julie says, giving in.

"Yeah, you're a regular fort Knox," Finn says teasingly. Julie sticks her tongue out at him before turning back to mommy.

_"Mental wounds not healing. Life's a bitter shame. I'm going off the rails on a crazy train! I'm going off the rails on a crazy train!" _she sings, banging her head like a rocker.

"Finn what have I told you about teaching our daughter Ozzy?" Rachel says with a stern tone as Julie finishes.

"Uh oh, mommy's mad, I don't think she likes the secret song," Finn says. "You know what I think?"

"What daddy?" Julie says in almost a whisper.

"I think we have to wipe mommy's memory," Finn says crouching down to face the little girl. "You know the only way to do that right?"

"What are you guys talking about?" Rachel says, feigning worry.

"I know," Julie says. "Tickling!" at that point they both rush toward the camera. And the picture becomes shaky.

"Stop!" Rachel says, giggling hysterically. "This is a new camera you're gonna make me drop it, stop!"

After that the screen goes blank, and Finn takes the remote and rewinds it to the beginning for the fourth time that night.

He doesn't remember when he fell asleep, but when he wakes up, it's 2 am the screen is bright blue and somebody is knocking on his door.

Tonight's one of those nights. He should have expected it. It seems like she always comes around when he's at his worst, drunk off his ass or living in his own filth. Misery loved company after all, he just wishes he could figure out how she always knew. Or perhaps she doesn't always come around when he's at his worst, perhaps he's just always that way now. The one day he spent with Naomi was the lone exception he could think of off the top of his head in the last five months. Either he was wasted, depressed or working. There was no other state of being at that point.

He knows that she can taste the alcohol on his mouth when he kisses her. She never kisses him first, but she doesn't stop him when he does it and tonight is no exception. It's been far too long since he's kissed her, he's missed this so fucking much.

"Take me to the bedroom Finn," she whispers in his ear. He obliges, trying not to stumble when he lifts her up and carries her into his room. They collapse onto the bed together, and he kisses every part of her he can reach, stopping only when she peels off his shirt.

"Wait, Rachel," he says as she gets to work on his belt.

"What," she says a little coldly.

He forgets what he was going to say, he's drowsy and still a little drunk. "Nothing," he groans before kissing her again, letting her finish unbuckling his belt. He wants her to talk to him, he wants her gentle touches and kisses and whispers, he wants to make love to her, he hasn't made love to her in so damn long, nowadays all they did was fuck and even then it was a much rarer thing than before. But as he slowly enters her and hears her soft gasp in his ear he feels this is so much better than not having her at all.

He doesn't want to fall asleep when they finish. Because he knows she won't be there when he wakes up.

"Rachel?" he says, reaching out to touch her. "Are you awake?"

"Yeah," she says softly.

He knows he shouldn't, but the urge is so overpowering, without thinking he moves in closer and puts one arm around her, holding her and burying his face in her hair, surprised that she doesn't try to move away, "I want you to stay Rachel."

"Until sunrise?" She says, her voice still free of emotion.

"Forever."

Part of him knew that it was coming, but as her body begins to heave with quiet sobs he can't help but feel a little like shit. She always gets that way when he tries to tell her how much he still loves her, she either cries or runs away because of her crushing guilt. She feels guilty that she can't be with him the way she used to, knowing how much he needs her, and it tears her apart inside.

"Shh, it's okay," He says, knowing full well that it isn't. "It's okay baby."

She doesn't stop crying, she doesn't turn to face him, but she doesn't leave either. He decides not to push it, he won't ask her what's wrong, because he already knows, he won't ask if there's anything he can do because he knows that there isn't. He just holds her, and she lets him. For the first time in five months she lets him hold her.

When he wakes up the next morning she's gone.


	6. A Different Person

She was so excited that night, her mother was a star. Actually she was an understudy, but since the other girl got sick it was Rachel's time to shine, she had talked about how she would blow the other girl out of the water and they would beg her to take over the show permanently, and she would be the first cast replacement to win the Tony award and she'd be offered so many roles that she wouldn't know what to do with them all. And every time she talked about it Julie would beam with pride. Rachel was so good that night they wouldn't have been surprised if everything she talked about came true.

"You were amazing mommy!" the little girl said, running into her mother's arms backstage.

"Thank you sweetheart, but you know I couldn't have done it without you," She said sweetly.

"Hey, what about me?" Finn said.

"Or my husband of course," she said, kissing him on the mouth.

"Daddy brought you flowers," she said, clinging on to her mother like a vice.

"He did?"

"It was supposed to be a surprise baby," Finn said.

"He got you tulips, they're in the car," she continued, looking almost proud of herself.

"Thank you, fort Knox," Finn said kissing his little daughter on the cheek.

"Alright lets go get those flowers," Rachel said. "And then maybe ice cream?"

"Yay, let's go let's go!" Julie said, dragging her parents behind her.

It was the last family outing they would ever have.

* * *

><p>He doesn't want to go to Kurt and Blaine's, but he hasn't seen them in over a month, there's no avoiding it at this point. He decides to shave, not because he particularly wants to, but because he knows they'll give him shit about it if he doesn't. Maybe it won't be so bad, he thinks to himself as he makes the trek to Greenwich Village.<p>

"Hello Finn, how are you holding up?" Blaine says upon greeting him at the door. It's already that bad.

* * *

><p>"When is the last time you've had a haircut?" Kurt says, pouring him some coffee. Finn wishes he would have had time to stop for a haircut.<p>

"I don't know," he says dourly, shrugging and sipping his coffee.

"Our parents called, apparently you haven't been returning their phone calls."

"I don't need them telling me to come back home," Finn says, remembering the last phone call he had with his mother.

"Well they miss you Finn. And I guess they figure since Rachel left there's no reason for you to stay here, New York was never your dream."

"Rachel's still my wife Kurt," Finn reminds him for what feels like the hundredth time. "I can't leave her, I won't."

"You don't have to, she left you," Kurt says. "Why didn't you give her a divorce when she asked?"

Finn wants to scream at this point, he's so sick of having this conversation.

"Because she still loves me, I know she does."

"It isn't about whether she loves you or not, we all know that Rachel loves you, but when you've been through something like that you aren't the same person anymore," Kurt says. "You're not helping her by keeping her tethered to you, you're keeping her from moving on."

Kurt was right, Rachel wasn't the same person she used to be, and neither was he. But the part that loved her endlessly was still there, and he couldn't let go, not for anything.

"You act like she's the only one that's hurting. I miss Jules too, every damn day. Besides, I didn't come here for marriage advice okay? I came to visit with my stepbrother."

"I'm sorry," Kurt says. "You're right."

"Me and Kurt are really happy to see you Finn," Blaine adds.

"How's work?" Kurt says, trying his best to keep the rest of the visit as neutral as possible.

"Same as ever," he says. He decides not to tell them about Naomi, he didn't need to get into that, especially since he probably wouldn't see her again for awhile, if ever.

"That's good, what about AA, have you been going to your meetings?"

"I stopped going like three months ago, the court said I did my time."

"Yeah but…"

"But what?" Finn says sharply.

"What Kurt means to say is that we hope you've been behaving responsibly, that's all," Blaine chimes in.

"You're one to judge," Finn scoffed. "Like you've never been drunk in public before, remember that incident outside The Elbow Room? I didn't know you could sing in Spanish." Finn knows he's being a bit of a jerk, but it's the only way to get Kurt and Blaine off his back.

"I didn't pee on a cop car and proceed to tell the cop to go fuck himself Finn," Kurt said.

"Have you talked to Rachel?" Finn says, changing the subject. He knows that he's just going from one sensitive subject to another, but he doesn't care, he knows that Rachel still talks to Kurt and he wants to know.

"She's still teaching piano and voice from her apartment, it seems to be keeping a roof over her head."

"I don't want to know how her job is, I want to know how_ she_ is," Finn says firmly. He knows how she is around him, but maybe it's different with Kurt.

"She's…" Kurt starts.

"That bad huh?" Finn says.

"She asks about you too," Kurt says. "Is he okay? What did he talk about the last time he visited? Has he been eating? She asks me stuff like that all the time."

"You can tell her I miss her," he says. "I miss her so fucking much," at that he breaks down and cries. He hasn't cried in months but now that he is the tears won't subside, probably because they've been backed up inside of him the whole time.

"We know Finn, we know," Blaine says as they both place a hand on his shoulder. He wipes his tears with one hand and grabs Kurt's hand with the other squeezing a little.

* * *

><p>He falls asleep on Kurt's couch, when he wakes up it's nearly ten O'Clock.<p>

"Are you sure you don't want to stay the night?" Kurt says as Finn puts on his Jacket.

"No, I have work in the morning," Finn answers. "But thanks, thanks for everything." He hugs his brother and Blaine and leaves, thinking the visit could have gone a lot worse.

He figures he'll watch a little TV when he gets home, maybe have a beer, nothing hard though, he really does need to drink less. But when he twists the key in the door and opens it, all of his plans for the night go flying out the window.

She's sleeping on his couch, still wearing the butterfly hoodie from earlier. He wonders how she got in, did somebody let her in? He wonders how she got out of the group home, how she escaped and why she decided to come find him. He could ask her all of the questions looming in his head, but he decides not to wake her, he'll deal with it in the morning. He walks up to her and drapes the blanket over her small, sleeping body. Scratches his head in confusion once again and goes to his room.


	7. A Suitable Foster Care Enviornment

She had been out for nearly 4 hours, he never left her side the whole time. He wanted to kill the bastard who did that to them, the careless son of a bitch who stole his family away in the blink of an eye, he wanted to take that cell phone he had been talking on when he ran that red light and beat him to death with it. He didn't know how he managed to keep it together so well, how he could hope for anything anymore knowing that his little girl was gone, but he hoped for one thing, he prayed over and over again that he wouldn't lose them both.

Rachel had always been wary of driving in the city at night, "the streets are full of maniacs," she always said. She was driving Julie home after a rehearsal. Finn was working that night, and although Rachel wanted to leave her with Kurt Julie promised that she would be good if she took her along. Rachel was usually so stubborn, but Julie was worse, she was the only one who could wear her down. She had been sleeping in the back seat when it happened, when the SUV crashed into them, destroying everything that Finn Hudson loved in a matter of seconds.

Finally she opened her eyes, the first thing she saw was Finn, holding her hand, his head hanging in grief.

"Finn," she said, her voice hoarse.

He looked at her, tears in his eyes, his face making her nervous. She remembered the accident, she remembered the sound of tires screeching and twisted metal, and the feeling of the SUV slamming into them, but she didn't know that Julie was gone, and the fact that he had to be the one to tell her just felt like God being extra cruel.

"Where's Julie?" she said softly. "Is she okay?"

Finn didn't open his mouth to speak, he only shook his head, tears still streaming down his face.

"Is she— was she hurt?" Rachel said, her eyes wide with worry.

"She's gone baby," he said so quietly she thought she misheard him at first, she hoped to god that she had.

"What?" she said, tears starting to well up in her eyes.

"Julie's gone," he repeated through choked sobs.

"No," she said, shaking her head, not believing it. "No because she…" She couldn't finish, she couldn't find any more words, only tears.

He got onto the hospital bed with her at that point and took her into his arms, and she stiffened a little, but didn't reject him trying to comfort her. "She's gone."

She squeezed her eyes shut, overcome with shock and grief for her lost daughter, and Finn held her in his arms, rocking her back and forth as she sobbed, trying to stay strong for her but feeling like the world had caved in on him.

* * *

><p>She's in the same place, watching TV and eating Froot Loops, and naturally she's made him a bowl too. It's as if nothing has happened, as if she doesn't even expect him to bring up the fact that she wasn't supposed to be there.<p>

"Um, hey Naomi," he says confusedly.

"Hi," she says simply before turning her attention back to the television. He sits down next to her, trying to get up the nerve to talk to her about why she was there.

"Naomi, is everything okay?" Finn says.

"Yes, why?" She says casually.

"Because you're kind of not supposed to be here," he answers her carefully. "How did you even get in?"

"You need better locks," she says, shrugging. Of course she would know how to pick a lock.

"Did you run away, from the group home?" he asks her, even though he's pretty sure he knows the answer.

"No," she says, wide eyed. "They told me I could leave."

He runs his hand over his face in frustration.

"Listen, I could get into a lot of trouble if you lie to me," he says, not angrily

She looks down, shifting her eyes a little.

"How did you escape?" he asks her.

"Through the bathroom window," she says under her breath.

"Listen Naomi, it's great seeing you again and everything, but you staying here, it was only supposed to be temporary."

"What does that mean?" she says.

"It means it was only for a little while, now you have to stay in the group home until they find your mom."

"But why can't I just stay here until they find my mom? It's more funner."

"Because it doesn't work that way."

"So you don't want me to stay anymore?" she says sadly.

"Of course, I would love for you to stay, but it's not up to me. You need a foster home."

"Well, why can't this be my foster home?" He wishes that kids were better at understanding things like this.

"Because there's a lot of paperwork and hurdles to get through, they can't just…" she continues to look at him as if him taking her in should be the easiest thing in the world, and he trails off, wishing he knew how to explain it to her.

"You know what, why don't you finish your cereal, I'm going to make some calls and then you can come with me to the firehouse okay?"

"Okay," she says, smiling her disarming smile at him and getting back to her Froot Loops.

* * *

><p>They answer the phone after one ring.<p>

"Liberty House Susan speaking," Says the kind voice on the other line.

"Yes, this is Finn Hudson, I'm calling about Naomi Travers," Finn said tentatively.

"Oh my god, have you found her? We've been worried sick."

"She was in my living room asleep when I came home last night. I was the firefighter who took her in over the weekend."

"Oh god bless you sir," She continues. "If you can bring her back—

"That's the thing," Finn says, cutting her off. "I don't think she wants to be there."

"Well, if I had it my way no child would ever have to be without a home, but that is unfortunately the reality of the situation."

He's not sure what comes over him, he knows that it's impractical, and unrealistic and probably criminally stupid, but he can't help the words that spew from his mouth.

"Who do I talk to about being a foster father?"

"Are you saying you want to provide a home for this girl?"

"That's what I'm saying," he continues.

"Well if you come in today we can get some paperwork started but I'm afraid it's not going to be an overnight thing."

He glances out of his bedroom door at her, still sitting there, eating her cereal and giggling like a madman at Spongebob.

"I'll do whatever it takes," he says, before hanging up the phone.


	8. Home Study

He just stood there, he didn't know what else to do. There she was, sitting on the couch, waiting for him to wake up, luggage gathered at her feet and tears streaking her face. It was as if it weren't real, as if he was having some sort of horrible nightmare that he just had to wake up from. He should have expected it, the past two months had been hell, if Rachel wasn't crying her eyes out she was shouting at him for doing the littlest things that reminded her of Julie, the first fight happened when Crazy Train played on the radio when they were driving home from the funeral, the second happened when she found one of Julie's stuffed animals under their bed, and it had been non-stop from then on. The night before was the last straw. She had been napping so he decided to cook dinner for them, when she woke up he was in such a frenzy to put her in something resembling a good mood that he hadn't realized that he slipped back into old habits, after setting the table for two people he absentmindedly reached into the cabinet for more plates.

"Are you expecting company or did you just conveniently forget that it's just the two of us now?" She snapped. "Our daughter is dead Finn that's not something you just forget, it's not like remembering to record a show for me on tivo."

"I'm sorry!" he yelled, sounding more angry than sorry. "Okay? I'm sorry for everything. I'm sorry for saying the wrong thing, I'm sorry for looking at you the wrong goddamn way, I'm sorry she died instead of me, I'm just so fucking sorry Rachel!" He knew that he shouldn't have blown up at her like that, but she was taking every opportunity to take it out on him, and he just couldn't handle it anymore, she was acting as if she was the only one it was happening to, and he felt like he had to let it out. He had to be the strong one for two agonizing months and it had taken its toll, he had never had to be the strong one before. After that she didn't say another word, she just walked away. When he woke up the next morning she had packed her bags.

"Please don't do this," he finally said.

"I called Kurt, he said I could stay there for awhile… until I find a new place," she said the last part so quietly he could barely make it out.

"Rachel we can work this out, we can get counseling, I'll do anything just please don't go," he pleaded, tears in his throat. "I can't lose you too, I just can't."

"I am so sorry Finn," she said. "I thought I could handle this but I can't. I can't even look at you anymore."

"Baby please," he said, full on sobbing now, dropping to her feet and holding her around the waist, his head in her lap. "Just think about this, think about what you're doing to us. We need each other now more than ever you just can't give up like this. You're the strong one, remember?"

The tears continued to fall freely from her eyes as he kissed her face and her mouth, whispering please Rachel over and over again between kisses, but she didn't respond, she didn't kiss him or hug him back.

He finally stopped pleading when she whispered the words that shattered what was left of his heart into a thousand pieces.

"I want a divorce."

* * *

><p>He walks hand in hand with Naomi to work, wondering all the while what the hell he's doing. This morning his biggest plan for the day was a game of poker at the firehouse, now without thinking he's signed on to take in a little girl he knows nothing about. All he knows is that she's beautiful and sweet and she loves musicals and Froot Loops and Spongbob and dressing like rainbow bright and she calls him Dolphin. He knows that he saved her life, and that you can't just save a little girl's life and then turn your back on her. But still, he knows what he's up against, he knows that he's going to have to explain his decision to a lot of people and that they probably wouldn't understand. He wonders if he's up for it.<p>

"When we get to the firehouse can I slide on the pole?" Naomi says, swinging his arm back and forth.

"If Chief Bramlett says it's okay," Finn says.

"What's it like being a fireman? Do you get to have a dog?"

"We have a Dalmatian at the station," he says.

She lets out an exuberant laugh, "that rhymes."

"His name's blaze, he's kind of our mascot, he goes with us to fire safety presentations and does tricks for the kids."

"Do I get to pet him?" she says excitedly.

"He'd probably be pretty upset if you didn't."

"Cool."

He's been avoiding this conversation, but he knows that it has to come sometime, especially since he spots the firehouse in the distance. "Naomi, there's something I wanted to talk to you about," he says stopping.

"Am I in trouble?"

"No, nothing like that," he says crouching down so he can be eye-level with her. "It's just that, I'm going to try, really hard to make it so that you can stay with me."

She gives him a big smile and starts to clap.

"But," he continues, cutting her off. "I want you to know that not everything works out the way you want it to. You see, there are a lot of reasons why I might not be able to take you in."

"Why?"

"Well, there are things about my life that may make it harder for them to let you stay with me."

"Did you do something bad?"

"Well it's more like a bunch of bad things happened to me," he says carefully. "I just want you to know that even if you don't end up with me, I'm sure that they'll find some place for you that's really great."

"Like with my mommy?" she says, making this ten times harder.

"Well, maybe, or like a nice house, with a nice family and even a dog."

"But what if I tell them I want to stay with you?"

He runs his hand over the top of his head in frustration. "Look I just need you to promise me that no matter what happens you won't run away again, can you promise me that?"

She looks at him for a moment, as if she's seriously contemplating his question. Finally she nods.

"Okay, let's go," he says taking her hand again.

They get to the firehouse at nine that morning and their faces are about what he expects. They don't say anything to him besides the typical "good morning" or "how's it going," and they all do the appropriate amount of gushing over Naomi, especially the women, but they don't ask him any awkward questions, and for that he's grateful. But he knows that they're going to bombard him good once they get him alone, and he's not looking forward to it.

"Okay kid, this is Mona, she's going to show you around the station," Finn says. "You'll get to see what I do here, and you'll get to meet Blaze."

"What's your name cutie?" Mona says sweetly to the little girl.

"Naomi," she answers.

"Well that's a very pretty name, do you want to come with me?" Naomi smiles and takes her hand.

"I have to get ready for work so I guess this is goodbye for now," Finn says. "The lady from Liberty House is coming to pick you up at 9:30. But remember what we talked about."

She gives him a sad nod and hugs him before going off with Mona.

* * *

><p>"Okay Hud, what's with the kid?" Slattery says the second he enters the locker room.<p>

"Is that the same little girl from the Motel fire on Saturday?" Meeks chimes in.

"That's her," Finn says simply.

"So are they giving out kids for a Job well done now?" Randall jokes.

"It's not like that, I'm just trying to help her. She was living in an abandoned motel clearly she needs help."

"Yeah but a kid isn't like a stray puppy Hudson, you can't just go up to the courthouse and say can I keep it." Slattery says.

"I know, and I'm not trying to adopt her or anything, I'm just going to see if they'll let her stay with me for awhile until they can find her a family."

"And you really think they'll let you take this kid, after everything…"

"Probably not Slattery," Finn interrupts, annoyed, the truth stinging him as he utters it. "But I have to try."

* * *

><p>He's filled out of the paperwork, not believing just how much they needed to know, it's been cleared by the office and today they're sending a case worker to his apartment. He's cleaned it himself for the first time since Rachel left, and he's so exhausted afterwards he can't even gather up the energy to feel a sense of accomplishment. He's surprised that he's made it this far, they didn't think they'd let the public drunkenness charge slide, but apparently he was right all of those times he said it wasn't that big of a deal. For the first time he thinks they might actually take a chance with him, and he can't help but feel a little warm at the thought. For the first time in months he cares about something outside of his failed marriage and his personal tragedy and it was the closest to happy he'd been in quite some time, now to pass this inspection.<p>

The woman seems pleasant enough, she's pretty, blonde, about 35 years old and nicely dressed, she smiles warmly at him upon entrance.

"Hello Mr. Hudson my name is Agnes Green," he can't help but think it sounds like an old woman's name.

"Hi, come right in," he says.

"Very clean, that's always a good sign." She says marking something on her notepad. "Now, where will the child sleep."

"Oh, right this way, he says." He takes Agnes Green to his room, it's the same as it always is, only the bed is made and the gym bag smell has been effectively vanquished.

"Well it's not the kid-friendliest of rooms but I'm sure it will do just fine," she says, marking in her book again. "Will you be sleeping in the other bedroom,"

"I'm sorry?" Finn says, not sure if he understands her question.

"Well according to your file this is a two bedroom apartment," she says looking through her papers.

He doesn't know what to say at this point, should he tell her the truth? "Um, yeah," he lies.

"May I see it?" she says.

"Why do you need to see it?" he says nervously.

"Well a home inspection means I have to look at every room of the apartment Mr. Hudson. I thought Gail went over this with you."

"No, she must have skipped that part," He says truthfully.

"It's an honest mistake," she says. "Do you mind if I take a look at the second bedroom Mr. Hudson?"

"Sure," he says, defeated. She follows him out of his room and to the other bedroom, the one he hasn't set foot in since before Rachel left. His hand shakes a little a little as he turns the knob and as he enters the room the ghosts of his past wash over him instantly, bringing fresh tears to his eyes.

She looks confused, he can't blame her.

"Well I would think this would be more than appropriate for a little girl," Agnes Green says as she gives the child's bedroom a onceover. "Is there any reason why Naomi can't sleep _here_?"

"It was…" he tries to find the words. "It was my daughter's room."

"Mr. Hudson I am so sorry, I didn't realize, I mean I read about the accident in your file but…"

"Don't worry about it," he says, shutting the door, "But if it's all the same I think I'll sleep on the couch."

"You know what, I'm not even going to mention it on my final report," she says. "Mr. Hudson, considering the situation and the fact that this girl seems to be very fond of you, I would love nothing more than to recommend this as a temporary foster home." A smile almost reaches his eyes. "However…"

Of course there's a however.

"It says in my file that you are married," she says. "We will need to meet with your wife before we can go any further."

He knew it was coming, he just hoped to God that it wouldn't.

"We're separated," he says simply.

She looks sympathetic and he's really happy that they sent someone nice, but he knows right then that there's nothing more that she can do.

"I'm sorry Mr. Hudson, we think that it's very noble what you're doing, especially in light of everything you've been through, but I'm afraid you've been caught in a technicality. The state of New York recognizes you as married, we're going to have to treat this as a two person household, and until we can get permission from your wife there's nothing more we can do at this time."

_I'm sorry Naomi_, he thinks quietly to himself.


	9. Crazy Train

He see's Agnes Green out, thinking to himself what the hell is he going to tell Naomi, He knows that he didn't promise her anything, but he can't help but feel terrible. He knows it was a long shot but he couldn't help but get his hopes up a little. He turns to reenter his apartment and sulk when he sees the last person he expects to out of the corner of his eye. It's Kurt, and he's not alone.

"What are you guys going here," He says a little less excitedly then they probably expected.

"What are you doing?" Burt says, "Who was that woman?"

"Finn is there something you want to tell us?" Carole adds.

"Why didn't you tell me you were coming?" Finn says.

"Well maybe if you answered your damn phone once in a blue moon we could have," Burt says.

"Who was that woman Finn?" Kurt repeats, more firmly than his father.

"She's nobody," Finn says lamely.

"Oh my god, you won't give Rachel a divorce yet you still insist on bringing other women to your apartment, are you serious?" Kurt said.

"Get inside, all of you," Finn says. They oblige, piling into his apartment, and he shuts the door.

"How could you even think that? I would never cheat on Rachel, you know me better than that," Finn says angrily.

"Do we Finn? Because you won't talk to any of us, you basically had a nervous breakdown in my apartment and I haven't heard from you since," Kurt says. "And now there's some woman leaving your apartment in the middle of the day, what was she on her lunch break or something?"

"No, she was at work," Finn says.

"Oh Finn," Carole says, shaking her head and clutching her mouth.

"No, that's not what I meant," Finn says frantically, realizing what his mother must think. "She's a social worker."

"Why were you meeting with a social worker," Burt asks.

Finn sighs, he may as well let the cat out of the bag. He reaches into his back pocket and takes out his cell phone, quickly finding the picture he took of Naomi at central park.

"Her name is Naomi Travers," Finn says, showing them the picture. "I saved her from a burning building a few weeks ago, she was homeless and they can't find her mother."

"Finn, excuse me if I'm jumping to conclusions here, but are you trying to adopt a kid?" Burt says with exactly the tone that Finn was fearing.

"No, I'm not trying to adopt her. I"m trying to provide a foster home, just until they can find a good family for her_._" He says.

"Finn that's a very sweet thing for you to do, but are you sure this is a good idea, I mean you lost your little girl seven months ago and you can't just replace her—

"I would never try to replace my daughter, ever, okay?" Finn says sharply, cutting his mother off. She simply nods, deciding not to stress it anymore.

"Do you think this is going to bring Rachel back somehow?" Kurt says.

"That's not what this is about," Finn insists.

"This isn't some kind of white guilt thing is it? Because I told you not to watch _The Blind Side_." Burt says.

"No, would you guys stop?" Finn says, annoyed. "Why do I need some sort of second agenda to care about an orphan? Don't most people care about orphans?"

"I care about orphans as much as the next guy, which is why I donate ten percent of my paychecks to Unicef every month, I don't try to bring them home with me," Kurt says.

"I didn't plan this okay, she was only supposed to stay for a day then she went to the group home and I thought I'd never see her again, but then I came home and she was here, she escaped and came here and I couldn't just…" he trails off.

"We understand son," Burt says, putting his hand on Finn's shoulder.

"We think it's very sweet that you want to help this little girl, but you have to be realistic sweetie," Carole says.

"I know all that," Finn says. "I know that I'm the last person who should be trying to take care of anyone, but I can't help it. I just feel like I owe it to her."

"You saved this girl's life Finn, and you got her off the street, that's more than most people would do," Kurt says, comfortingly.

"Not Naomi Kurt, Julie," Finn corrects.

"What do you mean Finn?" Burt says.

"I promised, I promised I'd never let anything bad happen to them," Finn says, starting to cry again. "And I blew it."

"What happened to Julie wasn't your Fault Finn," Burt says.

"I didn't have to go to work that night," Finn says, still crying. "It was my night off, but I'm such a goddamn pushover. I should have been at home with my kid, if I had then she'd still be here. But she's not, and I can't bring her back. I can't bring Julie back and I can't make Rachel come home, but I can help this little girl," he wipes his eyes and his face falls further as he realizes what Agnes Green said earlier. "Only I can't do that either as it turns out."

"What do you mean Finn?" Carole says, he looks at his mother, and realizes that she's crying too.

"I can't get Naomi without Rachel. And I would never ask her to do this with me, she's been through too much," Finn explains. "And she'd think exactly what you did, that I'm trying to replace our daughter."

"Finn you tried, that's what matters," Kurt says.

"Yeah, we're really so proud of you honey," Carole adds.

"But maybe this is for the best," Burt chimes in. "I'm sure this little girl will go to a great family that loves her."

"She's six Burt," Finn says. "Couples only want to adopt babies."

"You just have to have faith," Carole says. "Sometimes people are better than we give them credit for."

"Yeah," Finn says, not entirely convinced, "maybe."

* * *

><p>Rachel sits in her apartment, alone, always alone. She doesn't feel happy, or even sad anymore. She just feels numb, always numb. It's as if being away from him took the pain away, but took everything else away with it. The only time she feels anything anymore is when she sees him, when she lets him hold her and love her the way he used to, but when it's over it's just more sadness, and she just can't take it. She knows that she's hurting him, that she's killing him even. And it kills her too. She still cares about him so much, she still loves him<p>

_She still loves him_

She can't think about that, it hurts too much. She goes to her piano and starts to play. Beethoven at first, but then without realizing it the melody switches to something else… before long she realizes what she's playing, she wants to stop, but she can't, she keeps playing it over and over again until she's pounding on the piano, the force vibrating through her hands, almost hurting. Finally she slams the cover down and shoots up from the bench. She's so alone, and so thirsty, so damn thirsty.

She grabs the first glass she can find and turns on the tap, not bothering to turn the filter on, and she fills it and starts to drink the tap water that tastes vaguely like chlorine, and she finishes it off and pours another, and another until her stomach is bloated and she feels as if it's all going to come up. She fills the glass again and just stares at it that time.

Before she knows it she's hurled it against the wall, screaming, and she grabs another out of the cabinet and throws that one too, and another, and another until finally there are no glasses left and she collapses onto the floor. She can feel glass under her knees, piercing her skin, but she doesn't care. She just cries.

"Mental wounds not healing, life's a bitter shame," she sings softly through choked sobs. "I'm going off the rails on a crazy train."

* * *

><p>Finn returns to his apartment at about 8 O'Clock after spending the day with his mom, stepdad and stepbrother. He didn't talk much during, and they didn't expect him to, but he didn't mind them being there for once. They plan to visit Rachel the next day before flying home, they promise to tell him how she is. He hopes she's surviving, because he's in pieces.<p>

He twists the key in the lock and when he enters the apartment he almost has to do a double take.

"Rachel?" he says in almost a whisper.

She looks at him, it's the first time she's really looked at him in as long as he can remember. This isn't one of those nights, this is something else entirely. She's crying, naturally and she's wringing her hands as if she wants to say something but can't find the words.

"Rachel, tell me what's wrong," he says, walking up to her tentatively.

"I broke a glass today," she says. "Actually I broke all of them."

"That's okay," he says, confusedly, "We can go get you some new ones."

She nods, still looking at him, he's confused, she hasn't looked him in the eye in so long and now she won't tear her eyes away. "Or, you know," she starts, her voice shaky. "I can just use the ones here, if that's okay."

He doesn't understand what she means, "Rachel I—

She doesn't let him finish, she just crashes into him, sobbing, and he holds her and strokes her hair, still afraid of what's happening.

"I miss you so much Finn," she cries into his chest.

And he's crying now too, because his wife is back in his arms telling him that she misses him, and he misses her too and he loves her so much that he can't take it.

"Rachel," he says, looking into her eyes and brushing her tears away with his thumbs. Her eyes are still brimming with tears and she's shaking and she won't let him go, and he kisses her and tastes the saltwater on her lips as he captures them in his and he pulls her in tighter thinking he never wants to let her go again.

She tears her lips away from his, and the only thing that keeps him from closing the distance between them once more are the words that come out of her mouth next.

"Finn, I want to come home."

**I hope the ending of this chapter lifted your spirits a little, I promise that this story has already gotten as sad as it's going to get. **


	10. Time To Heal

**Short chapter this time around, but I still think you're going to like it.**

She's sitting on the couch and he's crouched down in front of her, rubbing peroxide on her cut knees. neither of them are saying anything, but it isn't an awkward silence, it feels more comfortable, like she's finally where she belongs again. He places a few band-aids over the cuts and pulls her pant-legs down before sitting on the couch next to her.

"Thank you," she says softly.

"No problem," he says as he reaches for her hand, happy that she squeezes it back.

"I'm so sorry Finn," she says, her voice breaking. "I'm so sorry I left you."

"Shh," he says. "That's over now, you came back to me. That's what matters."

"It wasn't supposed to be this way," she says, wiping a stray tear with the back of her hand. "We were supposed to be a family, we were supposed to drive Julie to her first day of kindergarten and high school and college, and she was supposed to visit us in the summer and bring home some boy that you hated instantly for no reason, and she was supposed to marry that boy and give us grandchildren and…" She trails off, her voice breaking again, and he lets go of her hand and puts his arm around her shoulders. "But none of that happened. One second we were happy, we were a family and the next, she's just gone. And it just didn't make any sense, is still doesn't make any sense and I'm just so angry Finn."

"I'm angry too, and heartbroken and confused," he says. "I still can't believe that she's gone, and you know when it happened I just felt like the whole world had turned against me, and the only thing that stopped me from ending it all was the fact that I still had you."

She squeezes her eyes closed and wipes her nose with the back of her hand, her body heaving with quiet sobs. And he rubs her back and pulls her close.

"And I had you too, and I was so grateful for that," she says, pulling herself together. "But it was just so hard Finn. Do you remember when I said that I couldn't look at you anymore?"

"Yeah, I remember," he says.

"It was because when I looked at you, all I could see was her," she explains tearfully. "Because you know she had your eyes and your smile and your freckles and…" she trails off, she has her hands on his face at this point looking into his eyes the way she used to. "She even had you taste in music," she continued, laughing a little through her tears. It had been so long since she laughed.

"You're wrong about one thing," Finn says brushing a stray bit of hair behind Rachel's ear. "She had _your_ smile. And she kisses him, it's the first time she's kissed him since before she left, and he deepens it, pulling her close and kissing her with every ounce of love in his heart.

"I screwed up Finn," she says breaking the kiss. "I screwed everything up."

"No, no you didn't," he says reassuringly. "You just needed time to heal."

"But so did you, and I just left you when you needed me the most," she looks so guilty and sad and he just wants to hold her and never let go.

"And do you know how I made it through," he says.

"How?"

"Because," he continues, stroking her hair softly. "Because I knew you would come back."

"You did?" she says.

"Of course I did, and I was right."

"I don't know where to go from here," she says. "But I know that I love you, I never stopped, not for a second. And I'm so sorry if I made you feel like I did."

He can't take it anymore, he needs to be with her now, he kisses her again and pulls her into his arms proceeding to carry her into his— no, their bedroom.

"Make love to me Finn," she whispers as he lays her down, and the words sound so sweet that they almost bring tears to his eyes. He presses his lips to hers again, kissing her tenderly as she softly caresses his face. He pulls off his shirt and she pulls off hers and they collapse into each other again, and he kisses her neck and feels his heart skip a beat when she moans softly and runs her fingers through his hair and whispers that she loves him, and he tells her that he loves her too. She unbuckles his belt and unbuttons his pants and pulls them down with ease. He's ready immediately, he needs her so much it almost scares him and he can tell that she needs him too and he's wanted this for so long.

"Tell me it's going to be okay," she says, her voice is so small and broken, and he knows that it's going to be a long time before she's done hurting, but she's here, she's here and he's never letting her go again. "Tell me everything will be okay."

"Everything will be okay," he says, looking deep into her eyes and speaking with conviction.

"I think I believe you," she says before pressing her lips to his again and he pulls off her pants and panties, not pulling his lips from hers for a second.

He enters her slowly, and feels her grip on him tighten as he begins to move in and out of her. She moves with him, meeting his thrusts with perfect rhythm, her legs wrapped around his hips like a vice and her arms around his shoulders, holding him close. They fit together like puzzle pieces, and their bodies are so aching with need that they can't let go, not even for a second, not even when the wave of pleasure washes over them and they collapse into each other, panting and shaking and in love. He lays there on top of her, planting light kisses on her damp skin as she runs her soft fingers up and down his back, and he drifts off to sleep, still entangled in his lover like a vine.

When he wakes up the next morning she's right there next to him.


	11. Breaking

**Another short chapter, but it's really just a lead-in to the next one, which is the last before the epilogue. **

Rachel was never one to sleep in, but in light of everything he expected as much. It was ten O'Clock and he was due at the firehouse in an hour. He wants to spend more time with her but she looks so peaceful, so he simply kisses her sweetly on the forehead and leaves her a short note.

_I'm going to work, I'll be home tonight. Kurt and my folks will probably be over later._

_P.S. I love you_

_P.S.S. Please don't leave_

He has one stop to make before work and he isn't looking forward to it. He imagines her sweet face as he tells her he can't take her in. In spite of everything he still wants to, but Rachel is so fragile, how can he expect her to take on such a huge responsibility after everything she's been through? It isn't fair to her and it isn't fair to Naomi. He just hopes she understands, but of course it is Naomi, the real world to her is like Algebra to him, she simply doesn't understand it.

When he gets to Liberty House he doesn't go in right away, he thinks about what he's going to say to her and how he's going to say it. There's no right way so he sucks it up and goes in.

"I'm looking for Naomi Travers," Finn says hesitantly to the woman at the front desk.

"You must be Finn Hudson," she beams. "We all think it's just wonderful what you did for that little girl."

He feels like shit.

"Dolphin!" squeals a familiar voice as she runs up to hug him around the legs.

He feels lower than shit.

"Hey Naomi," he says, crouching down to face her. "How are you doing?"

"Are you going to take me now? I kept my promise, I didn't run away," she says.

"About that," he says. "Listen Naomi, I can't take you with me."

Her face is about what he expects, but the way it makes him feel is even worse.

"You can't?" she says sadly. "Why not?"

Can I talk to her alone for a second?" Finn says to the woman.

"You can talk to her in the lobby if you'd like," she answers.

Naomi drags him back there by the hand.

"Sit down," he says, she obeys and he sits next to her. He doesn't want to lie to her, so he doesn't. He tells her everything, about Julie, about Rachel being so sad, about her leaving, even about his drinking. At the end he's in tears and she's wiping them away with her tiny thumbs.

Did he mention he feels like shit?

"That's why I can't take you, I'm just afraid that everything is too much of a mess right now. You deserve a family that's stable and happy and that's just not us right now," he explains. "But it doesn't mean that I don't want you, I do. I just can't."

She doesn't say anything, she just nods, her face saying it all.

"I have to go okay?" he says. And she gives him a tight hug that's like a bandaid on his wounded heart.

"Stay strong alright?" he says, reluctantly breaking the hug.

"I will," she says, giving him a weak smile.

* * *

><p>Work was long and boring, there was a kitchen fire that had already been put out by the time they got there and a nursing home resident who somehow trapped himself in the bathtub and took almost an hour to get free. He reminds himself to tell Rachel to kill him when he turns 70, but then decides against it, thinking she probably won't find it very funny. He gets home at 7 and is happy to see that she's still there, but isn't sure why she's standing at the door. Her face is hard to read and he knows that something is about to go down.<p>

"Are you okay, Rachel?" he says.

"Who is Naomi?' she says, not angrily. And he realizes that he left the paperwork from liberty house on the kitchen counter. Why didn't God make him smarter? He thinks to himself. He decides that it's best not to try to maneuver his way around this, he's a terrible liar to begin with and nobody can read him better than her, it's the main reason it was so damn hard pretending not to have feelings for her back in high school.

"She's a little girl that I saved from a fire a couple of weeks ago. She slept over so she wouldn't have to stay in the station over the weekend but after the people from the group home took her away she escaped and came here, because I don't know, she's just attached to me for some reason. And you know, I just… I didn't have the heart not to try. And it wasn't because I was trying to replace Julie or anything because I could never, ever do that. It was just… This girl she was all alone and she didn't have anyone and I was just trying to do the right thing and she's just so sweet and it's so hard to say no to her and I know that I should have told you—

She cuts off his rambling with a soft kiss.

"You did do the right thing," she says tearfully as she breaks the kiss, leaving Finn a little confused. "You did a very good thing. And I know your heart and I know that you would have done the very same if Julie were still here."

He nods quietly.

"But we can't take her Finn, not now," she says, a bit of guilt visible on her face.

"I know, I know that," he says. "I had to tell her before work."

"Was she okay?"

"I think so," He says. "I hope so."

She hugs him and rubs his back a little.

"I'm so glad you're here," he says his voice breaking.

"Me too," she says. "I love you Finn."

He missed hearing that so much.


	12. Heart and Soul

It's his day off today, he wants to sleep in the way he always does when Rachel's sleeping next to him, but his phone is ringing, and he can't not answer it because it could be Kurt or his parents and after the last visit he's never ignoring a call from them again. He loves his parents, but the last thing he needs is them showing up unexpected again. But it's not his parents, it's a number that takes him a second to recognize and once he realizes who it is he can't ignore it. He has a bad feeling about this, a very bad feeling.

"Hello?" he says hesitantly, picking up the phone.

"Hello Mr. Hudson, this is Susan from liberty house, I'm so sorry to wake you but I'm afraid it's urgent."

"Is this about Naomi?" He says, even though he can't imagine who else it could be about.

"Yes, I'm afraid she ran away again. We put her to bed last night and when we went to wake her up the next morning she was gone."

He rubs his neck in frustration, _so much for her understanding_ he thought to himself.

"I think I might know where she is," Finn says, getting out of bed.

"What's wrong Finn?" Rachel says groggily.

"Nothing, go back to sleep babe," he says, still on the phone with Susan.

He knows exactly where to find her, sitting at his kitchen counter with Froot Loops and cartoons. But when he gets there and sees that the TV is off and the chair is empty his blood runs cold.

"I'll call you right back," he thinks he hears her say _there's something you should know _before he hangs up the phone, but he doesn't pay it any mind. He checks the couch next, she's not there, then the bathroom, then the hallway, his closet and even Julie's room, she's nowhere to be found.

"Finn, what's wrong?" Rachel says sleepily, leaning out of the bedroom.

"Naomi ran away," he says quietly.

"What? When?" she says worriedly.

"Either last night or this morning, they don't know," He continues, his face fraught with worry. "I have to find her Rachel, I feel like this is all my fault. If I would have just…" he trails off.

"Okay," she says. "I'll go with you, just give me five minutes."

"No, you should stay."

"Finn, if she's important to you then she's important to me, I want to help," she insists

"Okay," he says, kissing her once on the forehead before going to his bedroom to put on his clothes.

They check the firehouse first, then the burned down motel where they question the young boy who used to bring her food, then central park and even the vintage clothing store, everywhere that Finn had taken her. It takes hours and they come up with nothing, as worried as he was before it's far worse now. Even Rachel is starting to get worried and she's never even met her.

"I think I should call Liberty House," Finn says.

"Finn you can't just give up," Rachel says.

"I'm not giving up, but maybe they know something that can help us," he says, dialing the number.

Susan picks up after one ring.

"Liberty House, Susan Speaking."

"This is Finn Hudson," he says.

"Have you found her?" Susan says frantically.

"I've looked in every place I could think of. Is there anywhere else you guys know of that she might be?"

There is quiet on the other line and Finn fears the call has been disconnected.

"Hello?" he says, making sure she's still there.

"I'm still here. But I think I know why she ran away," she begins tentatively, and he fears he knows what she's about to say. "This is difficult, but Naomi's mother was found dead last night, we had to tell her and she was of course very upset."

His heart sinks. "Do you know where they found the body?" he says, noticing the horrified look on Rachel's face as he says it.

"The police aren't giving out that information right now, but I suspect they've already looked there," she says.

"Okay, well thank you," he says, hanging up the phone.

"Oh my god Finn, did she die?" Rachel says, tears welling up in her eyes.

"No, her mother died," Finn says sadly.

"Oh no, that poor girl," Rachel says, and he knows that outpouring of emotion isn't just about Naomi. He kisses the top of her head. "Hey it's alright, we'll find her."

"Where else could she be?" Rachel says.

And suddenly it dawns on him, he can't believe he didn't think of it before.

"Rachel, what playhouses have shown both _Annie_ and _Little shop_ over the last few years?"

"Um, I know the sixth street playhouse did _Little Shop_ last year, but it closed six months ago," she says. "Why?"

"I think I know where she is."

* * *

><p>The sixth street playhouse isn't too far away and it's as they suspected, the locks have been picked and the door is open. A sudden feeling of relief washes over Finn. And it only grows once he hears the music echoing from backstage.<p>

_And then a mighty roar_  
><em>Will start the sky to cryin'<em>  
><em>But not even light'ning<em>  
><em>Will be frightening my lion<em>

_And with no fear inside_  
><em>No need to run<em>  
><em>No need to hide<em>  
><em>You're standing strong and tall<em>  
><em>You're the bravest of them all<em>

_If on courage you must call_  
><em>Then just keep on tryin'<em>  
><em>And tryin', and tryin'<em>  
><em>You're a lion<em>  
><em>In your own way, be a lion<em>

"Finn, is that her?" Rachel says.

"Yeah," Finn says with a bit of a smile, "that's her."

"Oh my god, you found a little star didn't you?" She says, tears in her eyes and a small smile on her face.

"Come on," Finn says and they head backstage.

And sure enough she's sitting at the piano, clumsily picking out notes on it as she sings her heart out.

"Naomi?" Finn says softly. She stops and turns around and her face is streaked with tears. "I heard about what happened to you mom, I'm… I'm so sorry."

She sniffles and turns back to the piano without a word, and she begins to play a simple tune.

"Hold on Finn," Rachel says, "I have an idea." And she walks up to the piano bench, sits and begins to play the other part of heart and soul. And he watches them, not saying a word. They finish after a few runs and Rachel turns toward her.

"I'm Rachel," she says.

"I know, I saw your picture in Dolphin's apartment," she turns to look at Finn and again to Naomi who begins absentmindedly hitting random keys again.

"Naomi, everyone is really worried about you," Finn says, walking up to her.

"And I'm sure they all miss your singing," Rachel says. "You have a beautiful voice."

"You used to sing on Broadway," she says as a statement rather than a question.

"Yeah, before…" she trails off. "How did you know that?"

"I saw your pictures in the book. You looked really happy."

"I was, I was very happy."

"My mommy wanted to sing on Broadway, but she couldn't because of the voices."

"Your mom was a schizophrenic?" Rachel says.

"I don't know what that means," Naomi says. "But my grandpa used to take care of us until he got too old and we were all alone after that. And now I'm alone."

Finn's heart breaks more and more with every word, he knew that she had problems but he had no idea how bad they were.

"I'm sorry I ran away again Dolphin, I know I promised I wouldn't," she says, her voice heartbreakingly sad.

"Hey, that's okay," he says sitting on the other side of her. "You were upset, I understand."

Naomi begins to cry more and wraps her arms around Finn's waist and cries into his chest. And he just looks at Rachel who has started to cry for about the fifth time that day. "Look, everything's going to be okay. I promise."

"He's right Naomi," Rachel says, stroking the little girl's back. "I know it hurts now but it's going to get better."

She sits up again and wipes her tears. "You have to take me. I don't want to go back to that stupid place. You guys have to let me stay," she says almost angrily."I won't get in your way I promise, and I know how to do chores, I'm really good at that, you know I am."

"Naomi I—

"Okay," Rachel says, cutting Finn off.

"What?" Finn says, not sure if he heard her right. He looks at her face and he realizes what's happening.

"You can stay with us, if you really want to."

He can't believe what he's hearing but she looks and sounds so certain.

"Are you sure?" Finn says.

"She's hurting Finn, and we're hurting," Rachel says. "We can all be hurting together. I want her to stay."

He contemplates her words for a few moments, wondering if they can handle all of this. The three of them are all so damaged and it's going to take years before they're really okay again. But he knows that Rachel is right, they can help each other through it.

"Okay," Finn says finally. "Okay. We're going to try to make this work."

"Really?" Naomi says, still sniffling.

"Yeah," Finn says, looking at Rachel as Rachel looks back at him. "We'll make it work."

**I wouldn't want to go back to Liberty House either, I think I made it seem like a pretty crappy group home with how easily they lose kids. Also, sorry ****I sprung the whole dead mom thing on you after promising that this story wouldn't get sadder, but I'm sure most of you saw that coming. One last thing, I didn't have an eleventh hour change of heart, it was always my plan to have them take in Naomi, although there is an alternate ending floating around in my head in which Kurt and Blaine adopt her, the main reason I decided against that ending was because I felt they were too inconsequential to the story (also I'm not enough of a Klaine shipper yet). ****Stay tuned for the epilogue, which should be posted in like half an hour. I'm a little shocked at how fast I zipped through this thing.**


	13. Epilogue: Ten Years Later

Finn hates it when Rachel tells him things at the last minute, but all the same he can't help but be a little excited, he has always wanted to see _Avenue Q_, and he knows she was thinking of him when she accepted the tickets from one of her _Chicago_ costars. But there's one hurdle he needs to get over.

He knocks lightly on her door.

"You may enter," she says dramatically. "How's it goin' Dolphin?" she says before turning her attention back to her fashion magazine.

"What's with you still calling me that?" Finn scoffs, he'll never tell her that he actually sort of likes it.

"What? That's your name Dolphin," she jokes nonchalantly, still flipping through the magazine.

"Yeah but just for laughs don't you think you could try something a little shorter… Like Dad maybe?"

She rolls her eyes, "I know you're my dad, _you_ know you're my dad, what's your obsession with labels?"

"Well when you put it that way…" He says, defeated. "Hey, I know it's short notice but do you think you can watch your brother tonight? Me and your mom scored last minute theatre tickets."

"Ask uncle Kurt, I have a date," She says.

"With who?" Finn says, knitting his brow.

"Craig Vitagliano from glee, you remember, we sang that duet at regionals?"

"That kid?" Finn says. "I hate that kid."

"You don't even know him."

"Rach," Finn says stopping her in her tracks as she passes by. "Did you know Naomi's seeing some kid from glee?"

"Yeah, Craig Vitagliano," Rachel says, putting on her earring. "Did your dad ask you about babysitting?"

"I have a date with Craig."

"Well plan B then, Kurt and Blaine are always begging to babysit anyway," Rachel says.

"Wait hold on, why is it that I'm the last to know about this Craig kid?" Finn says, not letting it go.

"Because you're a psycho who scares off all my boyfriends," Naomi says, affectionately in a way, "Besides I'm telling you now aren't I?"

"Am I at least going to get to meet him?"

"If you promise not to challenge him to a sing-off this time," Naomi says.

"Come on, that was like three times," He says rolling his eyes.

"Well you better call Kurt and Blaine," Rachel says. "I'll start getting Matthew's things together."

"Sorry mom," Naomi says

"Sure, you call _her _mom," Finn says dejectedly before walking off to call Kurt.

"What's with Dolphin?" Rachel jokes before going to pack Matthew's overnight bag.

* * *

><p>Almost eleven years Later, Rachel still hates to drive, but since buying the house in the suburbs there's no getting around it.<p>

"Mommy, I saw a dog today!" four, almost five year old Matthew says excitedly from the back seat as they make their way toward Kurt's, it still stings a little when they realize that he's the same age now that Julie was when she died. As happy as they are now to have their family and their life together, there isn't a day that goes by when they don't miss her

"You did?" Rachel beams. "I want to know all about it."

"He was big, like bigger than the car."

"Bigger than the car?" Finn says, "Are you sure you didn't just see a car?"

"No," Matthew giggles. "It was a dog, he was white with black splotches like a cow."

"Are you sure you didn't just see a cow?" Finn says teasing him.

"It was a dog daddy!"

"This seems like quite the dog," Rachel says. "I want to see this magnificent beast."

"You can't because he was riding in a car and it was going really fast."

"Okay how is it possible that he was bigger than a car but could still fit in a car?" Finn says.

"Honey, I think you're putting too much thought into the musings of a four year old," Rachel says.

"Can I have a dog? Noomi* has a dog," Matthew says.

"Audrey II is your dog too Munchkin," Rachel says.

"But she's a girl dog, I want a boy dog," Matthew says as they pull up to Kurt's "And Noomi got to name it, I want to name my dog Superman."

"How can a dog be named Superman? Shouldn't it be Superdog?"

"Let it go Finn," Rachel says teasingly.

Kurt meets them outside, thrilled to see his nephew as always.

"Kurt!" Matt says eagerly as he unhooks himself from the carseat and jumps out to hug Kurt. "I saw a dog today!"

"Should we tell him we're getting him a dog for his birthday?" Finn says.

"No, let it be a surprise," she says.

After visiting with Kurt for a while and saying goodbye to their son, they're back in the car, heading for the theatre, enjoying the radio and each other's company when a familiar tune begins to play.

He reaches for the knob, it's been a really long time since it's played with them both in the car but he doesn't want to risk it.

"No," Rachel said, grabbing his hand before he can turn it. "Leave it."

_Crazy, but that's how it goes_  
><em>Millions of people living as foes<em>  
><em>Maybe it's not too late<em>  
><em>To learn how to love<em>  
><em>And forget how to hate<em>

She begins to sing along, but there's nothing sad in it anymore, it reminds him of when they used to sing it together in the car, the three of them, and he only feels warm and nostalgic at the memory as he sings with her.

_Mental wounds not healing_  
><em>Life's a bitter shame<em>  
><em>I'm going off the rails on a crazy train<em>  
><em>I'm going off the rails on a crazy train<em>

_Let's Go!_

_I've listened to preachers_  
><em>I've listened to fools<em>  
><em>I've watched all the dropouts<em>  
><em>Who make their own rules<em>  
><em>One person conditioned to rule and control<em>  
><em>The media sells it and you live the role<em>

_Mental wounds still screaming_  
><em>Driving me insane<em>  
><em>I'm going off the rails on a crazy train<em>  
><em>I'm going off the rails on a crazy train<em>

_I know that things are going wrong for me_  
><em>You gotta listen to my words<em>  
><em>Yeah<em>

_Heirs of a cold war_  
><em>That's what we've become<em>  
><em>Inheriting troubles I'm mentally numb<em>  
><em>Crazy, I just cannot bear<em>  
><em>I'm living with something' that just isn't fair<em>

_Mental wounds not healing_  
><em>Who and what's to blame<em>  
><em>I'm going off the rails on a crazy train<em>  
><em>I'm going off the rails on a crazy train<em>

She takes his hand as the song comes to an end. _Everything is going to be okay_ they think to themselves.

**The End**

*** Matthew is mispronouncing Naomi's name**

**Well that's all folks, I hope a got a lot of good tears out of you, and some smiles too. I know I didn't make the dialog between Finn and Naomi in this chapter as touching as it could have been, but I thought it was better to convey that their relationship has grown into a very normal father/daughter dynamic in the last ten years. I think I'll write something a little happier next time, but until then check out some of my other stories. Most of them are actually pretty upbeat if you can believe it.**


End file.
